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No one teaches you at massage school how to discover feelings of transference and be “healthfully detached” while providing excellent stroking.
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My ability to not design my necessarily into every session comes from decades of experience and age. I am, after all, a business and continue to act as one, even when I experience “cold fish syndrome” from a client. Of course I will be the first to admit I’m selfish and LOVE reciprocation! It is a letdown when the client chooses to be indifferent and unreactive in a school, but I still rise to the occasion. Meditation can also be a helpful tool for the practitioner to be detached. Happy Valentine’s Day-Part 2 A great M4M masseur is one who has the ability to put his ego on hold, give himself, listen, supply multifaceted aspects of healing, therapy, preference AND be present in the moment without harming himself OR the client. But then isn’t that why some clients come to me? While others of course (Hello “T” in CT LOL!) have no problem whatsoever in welcoming the masseur experience, with open hearts and bodies, to the MAX! YUM! Eventually he did order to let go he got to explore new levels of enjoying himself and allowance “the baggage of the poisonous Mother” behind! I am always amazed at some one’s inability to enjoy themselves almost as if benefaction and retain delight is a language their bodies have forgotten to speak. At some moments, I had to firmly beg that he “raise his Mother out of the room” and affirm to him out loud that this was HIS time to enjoy himself and that his gay massage had nothing to do with this experience NOW. I did my best to make him touch comfortable gently assert sharing the language of bliss with him. It sounded like he was in the throes of a very toxic relationship. “C” was going through a lot of stress with his relationship with his Mother (a cancer patient) and on and on.
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Happy Valentine’s Day Part 1 I am grateful to have had a repeat client last night.